...and So It Begins...

October 21, 2012 my grandmother passed away.  Some will say it was peaceful.  I disagree.  Watching someone die with COPD is not peaceful if you truly understand what is happening.  Hopefully I am  completely clueless about my demise or you will find me on a really fast horse, no helmet, and my affairs in order as I ride off into the sunset never to return.

I pray that she knew The Lord.  I do not know for sure.  She hated death.  She was unable to discuss the reality of it.  As a Christian, I do not have the gift of evangelism.  I am working on it.  But it is HARD!  I struggle so with the finality of the fact that my non-Christian family and friends will not enjoy eternity with me.  I am not anxious about death.  I know it is a better place than the cold doldrums of Chicago and the sinful world in which we live.

I digress....

Today I finally brought two boxes of dolls to the postal center near my home.  Sunny, the owner and I are going to bond over the next year.  See my grandmother thought it grand to will me her dolls.  Yes....300 or 400 plastic or porcelain creatures that I have to sell one by one.  It feels more like penance than something someone receives in a will.  I did not like dolls as a child.  I really do not like dolls now.  Funny, I can almost hear my grandmother laughing at me.  "You did not come see me enough. Now, you can spend lots of time with my dolls."  UGH!

So I have decided.  I can either be miserable every minute of dealing with these miniature people or I can think of each one as one step closer to helping children.  Percentages have been set in my excel spreadsheet and there is a column set aside for either a mission trip for me to meet my Compassion kiddo in the Philippians or a mission trip to Zambia to teach local teachers best practices.  Another column is set aside for  our vacation fund.  Gran loved to travel.  She adored hearing about our travels with the kids.  With the proceeds, I hope to pay for our timeshare that we enjoy so very much.

Happy thoughts......  I am trying.  I hate dolls and I do not need more work to do.  There is a reason that I have been given this task.  I pray that the Lord grows me through it.